I am pleased to announce my candidacy for President of the United States of America.
Now, I know what some of you are saying. And, yes, I can read minds. Fear me. Fear my power. But more importantly, there are several commentators whom I refuse to address. You know who you are.You should be ashamed of yourselves.
Moving onward...
I know it won't be easy. Mostly, this is because I lack major party backing. It is also because I refuse outright to accept kickbacks from the business interest fat cats! I also do not ask my potential future constituents for their hard-won money. I'll go it my own. Grassroots. Web 2.0. Buzzword bingo. Mano a mono.
Thank you for your time, and I wish you all the best.
-Caesar ad sum iam forte
We have nothing to fear but our impending doom. However, enough consumerism will distract us for a good long while.
